NYC & Long Island Divorce — Weisman Law Group, PC - NYC & Long Island Divorce — Weisman Law Group P.C.
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What Happens When Spouses Cannot Agree? Understanding a Contested Divorce in New York

9/29/2026

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A divorce does not become contested simply because two spouses are unhappy with each other. The issue is whether they can reach an agreement on the matters that need to be resolved before the marriage can be legally ended. 

When disagreements remain over finances, property, support, or parenting, the case can take a different path. For someone looking for a divorce attorney in Nassau County, understanding that distinction can make the next step feel less uncertain.

Disagreement Can Be About More Than Ending the Marriage

Many people hear contested divorce and assume one spouse is refusing to get divorced. That is one possibility, but it is not the only one.

A couple may both agree that the marriage should end while disagreeing about what happens afterward. One spouse may want to remain in the marital home. The other may want it sold. They may disagree about maintenance, child support, or how parenting time should be arranged.

Property can create another layer of disagreement. A retirement account, business interest, debt, inheritance, or real estate may raise questions that cannot be settled with a quick conversation.

New York Courts describe a divorce as contested when spouses disagree about the divorce itself, the legal grounds, or issues involving children, finances, or property. That means the word “contested” says something about the unresolved issues. It does not tell you why the couple is fighting or how the case will ultimately be resolved.

What Changes Once the Case Is Contested?

A contested divorce generally requires the unresolved issues to be addressed through the court process unless the spouses later reach an agreement. That can involve exchanging financial information, negotiating proposed terms, attending court conferences, and presenting evidence when necessary. The specific steps depend on the circumstances of the case.

The practical difference is that you are no longer working from a complete agreement. There are decisions that still need to be made.

This is one reason it can help to understand your position before signing documents or making informal promises. A decision that seems minor at the kitchen table may affect property, support, or parenting arrangements later.

For someone searching for a divorce attorney in Nassau County, the useful question is not simply, “Will my divorce be contested?” It is also, “What exactly are we unable to agree on?” That answer can help identify where the real legal work lies.

Children Can Change the Conversation

When children are involved, disagreement can become much more personal. Parents may have different ideas about where the children should spend school nights, how weekends should work, who handles transportation, or how holidays are divided. They may also disagree about legal decision-making.

Child custody is not simply about choosing which parent gets more time. Parenting arrangements can affect school routines, travel, holidays, vacations, communication between parents, and decisions involving the child.

New York Courts emphasize that custody and parenting time are among the issues that may need to be resolved before a divorce can be finalized. A parent should therefore avoid assuming that a verbal understanding will be enough. A clear agreement can reduce confusion about what happens after the divorce. When parents cannot reach that agreement, custody can become one of the central issues in a contested divorce.

Financial Disputes Need Their Own Attention

Money disagreements often involve several connected questions. A couple may need to address the marital home, bank accounts, retirement assets, debts, maintenance, and other property. If one spouse owns a business or has complicated compensation, the financial picture may require additional review.

That is different from simply asking, “Who gets what?” The first question may be what property exists. The next may be whether it is marital or separate. From there, the parties may need to determine how the property should be addressed under New York law.

Maintenance can raise another set of questions. The amount and duration of support are not determined simply by looking at which spouse earns more. These issues are why a contested divorce can require careful preparation even when the disagreement initially appears to involve only one subject.

A Contested Divorce Does Not Mean Every Issue Must Stay Contested

There is another point worth understanding. A divorce may begin with disagreement and later become more settled. Spouses can negotiate during the case, and some couples may choose mediation if they are both willing to participate.

The fact that litigation has started does not necessarily mean every remaining issue has to be decided by a judge. Our Weisman Law Group's mediation information explains that mediation can sometimes be considered even after litigation has begun.

That can matter when the parties are able to have productive discussions but need help organizing the remaining issues. For someone in Nassau County, the goal should be to understand what needs to be resolved, what information is missing, and which legal process fits the situation rather than assuming that every contested divorce follows the same path.

Conclusion

A contested divorce begins with unresolved disagreement, but the disagreement can take many forms. The real work is identifying the issues that remain open and understanding how those issues affect your finances, children, property, and future arrangements.

If you are considering a divorce attorney in Nassau County, getting informed before major decisions are made can give you a clearer picture of what comes next. At Weisman Law Group, we approach divorce matters by looking at the specific issues involved and the circumstances surrounding them. When negotiation is possible, that can be part of the discussion. When litigation is necessary, preparation matters.

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Why Equitable Distribution Is Not Always a 50/50 Split in New York Divorce

9/24/2026

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“Half of everything” sounds simple. New York divorce law is not quite that simple. Equitable distribution is the framework used to divide marital property, but equitable does not automatically mean equal. For someone looking for a divorce attorney in Hicksville, understanding that distinction can prevent an important misunderstanding about what happens to property during a divorce.

Equitable Does Not Mean Equal

The word “equitable” is sometimes confused with “equal.” They are not the same. New York Courts explain that property in a divorce is divided equitably, though not necessarily equally. The law distinguishes between marital property and separate property and provides factors that can affect how marital property is distributed.

That means there is no automatic rule saying every marital asset must simply be divided down the middle. The circumstances of the marriage matter. This is why a couple cannot necessarily look at the balance of a bank account or the value of a house and immediately determine what each spouse will receive.

First, You Need to Know What Property Is Involved

Before discussing how property should be divided, you need to know what property exists. That can include the family home, bank accounts, retirement interests, investments, vehicles, business interests and debts. The financial picture may be straightforward in one marriage and much more complicated in another.

A property may also need to be examined to determine whether it is marital property, separate property, or a combination of the two. New York Courts generally describe marital property as property acquired during the marriage, regardless of which spouse holds title, while separate property can include property owned before the marriage and certain inheritances or gifts. Those distinctions can affect the analysis.

Separate Property Can Become a Complicated Question

Suppose one spouse owned an asset before the marriage. That does not necessarily mean the entire financial history of that asset can be ignored. There may be questions about how the asset changed during the marriage, whether marital funds were used, or whether the other spouse contributed to its value. The answer depends on the specific facts.

This is one reason a divorce attorney in Hicksville should not approach property division by looking only at whose name appears on an account or deed. Ownership and classification are related questions, but they are not always the whole story.

Contributions Are Not Limited to Paychecks

Another common misunderstanding is that only direct financial contributions matter. Marriage can involve many forms of contribution. One spouse may earn most of the income while the other takes on substantial household responsibilities or supports the family in ways that allow the earning spouse to build a career.

New York's equitable-distribution framework recognizes various factors when determining how marital property should be distributed. The point is not to assign a dollar value to every household task. It is to recognize that a marriage can involve different forms of contribution. That is one reason the final property analysis may not look like a simple accounting exercise.

A House Is Not Just a Number

The marital home often carries financial and practical questions at the same time.
  • If one spouse wants to keep the house, there may be questions about affordability, the mortgage, other assets, and how the home's value fits into the broader property settlement.
  • If the house is sold, the parties may need to address the sale process and how the resulting proceeds are handled.

When children are involved, the home may also be connected to questions about stability and parenting arrangements. So the answer to “Who gets the house?” cannot always be separated from the rest of the divorce.

Equitable Distribution Is Different From a High-Asset Divorce

This distinction matters for our broader divorce discussion. This article is about the equitable distribution framework itself. A separate high-asset divorce may involve additional financial complications, such as business interests, complex compensation, investments or multiple properties. The two subjects overlap but they are not identical.

A couple with a modest number of assets can still face a complicated property-division question. A high-income couple may have a much larger financial picture requiring additional investigation. The legal concepts should not be reduced to a single formula.

Conclusion

Equitable distribution is about fairness under New York law, not an automatic 50/50 division of every asset. Before anyone can understand what a spouse may receive, the property involved needs to be identified and properly classified.

If you are considering a divorce attorney in Hicksville, reviewing the full financial picture before making assumptions about property can make the process clearer. At Weisman Law Group, we examine the details surrounding property, assets, debts, and the circumstances of the marriage when addressing divorce-related financial issues.

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What Happens When Parents Cannot Agree on Child Custody

9/22/2026

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When parents separate, the hardest disagreement may have nothing to do with the house or bank accounts. It may be about the children. Questions about where a child will live, how parenting time will work, and who makes important decisions can affect everyday life long after the divorce is finished. 

For a parent looking for a child custody lawyer in Hempstead, understanding what custody actually covers is a useful place to begin.

Child Custody Is More Than Where a Child Sleeps

People often use “custody” to describe a child's living arrangement, but custody can involve more than that. Residential custody concerns where a child lives. Legal custody concerns decision-making authority. Those two issues do not always have to produce the same arrangement.

For example, parents may need to decide how major choices involving education, medical care, or other important areas of a child's life will be handled. They may also need a practical schedule for school days, weekends, holidays and vacations.
The details matter because a parenting arrangement that looks simple on paper may become difficult once ordinary family routines begin.

Why Parents End Up Disagreeing

Parents may disagree about custody for very different reasons. One parent may believe the child should remain in the current home because the child is settled at school. Another may have a work schedule that makes a different arrangement more practical.
Distance between homes can matter. So can transportation, school schedules, extracurricular activities and the child's existing routine.

Some disagreements are more serious and may involve concerns about a parent's ability to provide appropriate care. The important point is that a custody dispute cannot be understood simply by asking which parent wants more time. The circumstances surrounding the child and the parents matter.

The Child's Interests Are Central

New York custody decisions focus on the best interests of the child. That does not mean there is a single checklist that automatically determines the outcome of every dispute. Family circumstances differ, and the facts of one case may have little connection to another. Parents should therefore be careful about relying on advice from friends or assumptions based on someone else's divorce.

At Weisman, our existing custody material similarly emphasizes the importance of the child's best interests when custody issues are being addressed. For someone searching for a child custody lawyer in Hempstead, the better question is what facts are actually relevant to the child's situation and how those facts should be presented.

A Parenting Schedule Has to Work in Real Life

A custody arrangement is not useful if it only works on paper. Consider a school week. 
  • Who handles morning drop-off? 
  • Where does the child stay on school nights? 
  • How are after-school activities handled?





Then there are weekends, holidays, summer vacations, birthdays, and unexpected schedule changes. Parents may also need a method for communicating when plans change.

These details can seem small during a legal discussion, but they become much more noticeable once both parents are living separate lives. A workable parenting schedule should reflect the family's actual routines rather than an idealized version of them.

What If Parents Cannot Reach an Agreement?

When parents cannot resolve custody issues themselves, the dispute may need to be addressed through the legal process. That does not necessarily mean every decision must immediately go to a trial. Depending on the circumstances, parents may have opportunities to negotiate or consider mediation.

New York Courts explain that mediation can be used in many custody and visitation matters, with a neutral mediator helping parents discuss future parenting arrangements. But mediation is not appropriate for every family or every situation. New York Courts specifically recognize that cases involving domestic violence or abuse may require a different approach. The process should fit the circumstances.

Keep the Focus on the Child's Actual Needs

It is easy for custody disputes to become arguments about which parent is “better.” That framing can make an already difficult situation harder. A more useful approach is to identify the child's actual needs and the practical facts surrounding the proposed parenting arrangements.

School. Daily routines. Transportation. Medical needs. Communication. Stability. The legal process is not simply about giving each parent an equal number of days. It is about establishing arrangements that address the child's needs under the circumstances of the case.

Conclusion

Child custody disagreements can become complicated because they affect the daily life of a family, not just the legal status of a marriage. Understanding the difference between residential arrangements, decision-making, and parenting time can help parents approach the issue with greater clarity.

If you are considering a child custody lawyer in Hempstead, start by identifying the parts of your current family routine that need to change and the parts that should remain stable. At Weisman Law Group, we look at the circumstances of each family when helping parents address custody and related divorce issues.

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What Does an Uncontested Divorce Actually Require in New York

9/15/2026

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An uncontested divorce sounds straightforward. In practical terms, though, it requires more than both spouses saying they want the marriage to end. The financial and parenting issues that apply to the family also need to be addressed. 

For someone considering a divorce lawyer in Oceanside, understanding what “uncontested” actually means can prevent an important misunderstanding before paperwork is filed.

Wanting the Divorce Is Only One Part

Two spouses can agree that their marriage should end and still have an unresolved divorce.
  • Maybe they agree to separate but cannot decide what happens to the house.
  • Maybe they agree about the children but disagree about maintenance.
  • Maybe the major financial issues have not been discussed at all.

New York Courts explain that an uncontested divorce involves agreement about the parts of the divorce that need to be resolved, including finances, property, and, when applicable, custody and child support. So “we both want a divorce” does not automatically make a case uncontested. The remaining issues matter.

What About Property and Debt?

Property can be one of the biggest reasons a divorce that initially seems simple becomes more complicated. Spouses may need to address the marital home, bank accounts, retirement interests, investments, vehicles, business interests and debts. An agreement should not simply say that everything has been “split fairly.” The actual terms need to be clear.
  • Who keeps the house? 
  • If it will be sold, how will the sale be handled? 
  • What happens to joint debt? 
  • How are retirement assets addressed?

The answers depend on the circumstances of the marriage. For someone looking for a divorce lawyer in Oceanside, this is a good reason to review the financial side of the divorce before assuming that filing paperwork will be the easy part.

Children Bring Another Set of Decisions

If children are involved, an uncontested divorce generally requires the parents to resolve parenting-related issues as well. That can include custody, parenting time, and child support. A useful parenting agreement should reflect the family's actual routine.

School schedules matter. So do holidays, vacations, transportation, and changes in work schedules. The goal is not to create a schedule that looks perfect on a computer screen. It needs to be clear enough to work when the ordinary pressures of family life begin. If parents have not reached an agreement on these issues, the divorce may not qualify as uncontested simply because they agree that they want to separate.

Maintenance May Need to Be Resolved Too

Spousal maintenance can also be part of the financial discussion. New York Courts identify maintenance as one of the issues that may need to be resolved in an uncontested divorce. That does not mean every spouse will receive maintenance. It means the issue needs to be addressed where applicable.

A couple may agree on an amount, agree that no maintenance will be paid, or have another arrangement permitted by their circumstances and the law. The terms should be documented rather than left as a verbal understanding.

An Agreement Needs to Be More Than a Handshake

An uncontested divorce generally relies on written documents setting out the parties' agreement.

At Weisman, our current divorce page explains that an uncontested divorce involves resolving the relevant matters and memorializing the resolution in a written stipulation of settlement. That written document becomes important because it gives the parties and the court something concrete to work from. Vague promises can create problems later.

If the couple agreed that one parent would have the children “most of the time,” for example, the phrase may not answer what happens during holidays or school breaks. Clear language matters.

What If You Agree on Most Things but Not Everything?

This is where many couples need to slow down. A couple may have resolved nine issues and still be stuck on one major question. That does not mean the remaining issue should simply be ignored so the divorce can be called uncontested. Instead, the unresolved issue needs to be addressed.

Depending on the circumstances, negotiation or divorce mediation may help the spouses work through the remaining disagreement. New York Courts recognize mediation as one possible form of alternative dispute resolution when spouses have not reached agreement but may be able to do so with assistance.

Conclusion

An uncontested divorce is not simply a divorce where nobody is angry. It is a divorce in which the issues that need to be resolved have been addressed and documented appropriately.

If you are considering a divorce lawyer in Oceanside, take the time to identify the unresolved questions before assuming the case will be simple. At Weisman Law Group, we help clients look at the legal and practical issues involved so they can understand what needs to be addressed before moving forward.

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What Should a Parenting Plan Address After Separation?

9/10/2026

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A parenting plan can look simple until parents start thinking about the details. “Alternate weekends” may sound clear until a school holiday falls on a Friday. “Split the holidays” raises the next question: which holidays, and who has the children when? 

For a parent considering a child custody attorney in Westbury, these practical details can be just as important as the larger custody discussion.

Start With the Family's Normal Week

A useful parenting plan should begin with ordinary life.
  • Where will the child be on school nights? 
  • Who handles transportation? 
  • What happens after school? 
  • Where does the child stay when one parent has a work commitment?

These questions are not exciting, but they are the ones that can create repeated disagreements if they are left vague. A schedule should fit the family's actual circumstances.

A parent who works late may need a different arrangement from a parent who works from home. A child involved in after-school activities may have a different schedule from a child with few commitments. There is no single parenting plan that works for every family.

Weekends Are Only Part of the Schedule

Many parenting arrangements focus heavily on weekends. But school days make up much of a child's year. A parenting plan may need to address school nights, weekends, holidays, school breaks, summer vacations, birthdays, and special occasions.

At Weisman Law Group, our mediation page specifically discusses customized parenting schedules that can account for weekdays, weekends, holidays, summers, vacations and special circumstances.

That flexibility can matter because a schedule that works during the school year may need adjustment during summer.

Holidays Need More Detail Than “We Will Share Them”

Holidays can become difficult when parents have different expectations. One parent may consider a particular holiday more important because of family traditions. Another may have relatives who live out of state. A parenting plan can address these situations before they become last-minute arguments.

It may specify where the child will be during particular holidays, how exchanges will happen, and whether holidays alternate from year to year. The same applies to school breaks and vacations. Clear language can prevent two parents from interpreting the same sentence in completely different ways.

Travel Should Not Be an Afterthought

Travel can create questions that do not arise during an ordinary week.
  • Can one parent take the child on an extended vacation? 
  • How much notice should be provided? 
  • What information should be shared?

The exact terms depend on the family's circumstances and any applicable legal requirements or court orders. The important point is to think about travel before the first major vacation arrives.

Parents who live farther apart may also need to address transportation responsibilities. A parenting schedule that ignores travel time may become difficult to follow.

What About Changes to the Schedule?

Life does not always follow the calendar. A child may become sick. A parent may have an unexpected work obligation. A flight may be delayed. A school event may be added. A parenting plan cannot predict every possible problem. It can, however, give parents a method for handling ordinary changes.

For example, parents may agree on how much notice should be given for schedule changes or how they will communicate about an unexpected problem. The goal is not to create a document that controls every minute of family life. It is to reduce uncertainty around the situations that are likely to arise.

Decision-Making Deserves Its Own Section

A parenting plan should not focus only on where the child spends time. Parents may also need to address how important decisions are made. Education and medical care can raise questions about communication and decision-making responsibilities.

Parents may disagree about what counts as an important decision or how quickly the other parent needs to be consulted. Those details deserve attention when the custody arrangement is being developed.

A Parenting Plan Can Be Part of a Larger Custody Agreement

A parenting plan is not necessarily the entire custody arrangement. It may sit alongside broader terms addressing custody and decision-making. That distinction is worth understanding because parents sometimes focus on the calendar while overlooking the legal structure around it.

New York Courts recognize parenting time as part of custody matters, and Weisman discusses custody and visitation as issues that may need to be resolved as part of a divorce. If parents can reach an agreement, mediation may provide one way to work through the practical details. If they cannot, the custody process may require a different approach.

Conclusion

A parenting plan should answer the ordinary questions that arise after two parents begin living separately. School days, weekends, holidays, vacations, transportation, communication and important decisions all deserve attention.
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If you are considering a child custody attorney in Westbury, start by looking at how your family's week actually works. At Weisman Law Group, we help parents examine the legal and practical custody issues involved so that important details are not left to guesswork.

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What Can Affect Spousal Maintenance in a New York Divorce?

9/8/2026

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Spousal maintenance can be one of the more difficult financial questions in a divorce because it deals with life after the marriage ends. The issue is not simply which spouse earns more. Income, the length of the marriage, financial circumstances, and other factors can matter. 
If you are considering a matrimonial lawyer in Levittown, understanding what goes into the discussion can help you ask better questions before an agreement is signed.

What Is Spousal Maintenance?
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Spousal maintenance, sometimes called alimony or spousal support, is financial support that one spouse may be required to pay to the other. It can arise during the divorce process or after the divorce, depending on the circumstances.
New York has statutory guidelines that can be relevant to maintenance calculations, but the details of a particular case still matter. That is why it is risky to assume that a friend’s maintenance arrangement tells you what will happen in your own divorce.
Different marriages have different incomes, expenses, lengths, property arrangements, and financial histories.

Income Matters, But It Is Not the Only Question

Income is an obvious part of a maintenance discussion. The court may need to look at each spouse's financial circumstances rather than simply comparing two salary figures. For example, one spouse may earn a salary while also receiving bonuses or other forms of compensation. Another spouse may have a lower current income but a different earning capacity or financial resources. The complete financial picture matters.

New York Courts provide maintenance worksheets and tools for guideline calculations, while also recognizing that maintenance questions can arise in both contested and uncontested divorce matters. For someone considering a matrimonial lawyer in Levittown, gathering accurate financial information early can make it easier to understand what is actually being discussed.

The Length of the Marriage Can Matter

The length of the marriage is one factor identified by us when discussing spousal support. That does not mean there is a simple rule where a marriage of a particular length automatically produces a particular maintenance result.

Instead, the duration of the marriage forms part of the broader picture. The same financial arrangement may raise different questions in a short marriage than in a marriage lasting decades. Other facts still matter, so the length of the marriage should be considered alongside income, property, contributions, and the circumstances of both spouses.

Financial Contributions During the Marriage Can Be Relevant

Marriage is not always divided neatly into “income earner” and “non-income earner.” One spouse may have earned most of the family's income while the other managed the household or supported the family in ways that affected the couple's financial life.
New York's divorce framework recognizes that contributions during a marriage can matter in financial matters. That does not mean every contribution results in a specific maintenance award. It means the financial history of the marriage deserves closer attention than a simple comparison of today's paychecks.

Maintenance and Property Division Are Connected, But They Are Different

It is easy to combine all divorce-related money issues into one category. They are not the same. Property division addresses marital property and debts. Maintenance addresses financial support between spouses. The two can affect each other in the overall divorce negotiation, but they involve different legal questions.

For example, a spouse may be negotiating over the marital residence while also discussing maintenance. The value of the property, the cost of maintaining the home, and each spouse's financial resources may become relevant to the broader discussion.
That is why financial issues should be reviewed together rather than handled as isolated numbers.

A Maintenance Agreement Should Be Read Carefully

If spouses negotiate maintenance rather than asking a court to decide it, the final agreement needs careful attention. Questions may include the amount, duration, payment terms, and what happens if circumstances change. The language matters.

A person should understand what they are agreeing to before signing a settlement document. If individual legal advice is needed, the person should have an attorney review the proposed terms. This is particularly important when maintenance is only one part of a larger financial settlement.

Conclusion

Spousal maintenance is not determined by one number or one fact. New York's rules provide a framework, but the circumstances of the marriage and the financial information involved still matter.
If you are considering a matrimonial lawyer in Levittown, gathering a clear picture of income, expenses, property, and the history of the marriage can help you understand the questions that need to be addressed. At Weisman Law Group, we approach maintenance as part of the broader financial picture rather than treating it as an isolated calculation.

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When a High-Asset Divorce Involves a Business or Complicated Finances

9/3/2026

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A high-asset divorce can look very different from a divorce involving a few bank accounts and a family home. A business may be involved. There may be retirement interests, investment accounts, multiple properties, complex compensation, or questions about what belongs to the marriage and what does not. 

For someone considering a matrimonial attorney in Valley Stream, the first challenge may be understanding the full financial picture.

The First Problem May Be Finding the Full Picture

In a financially complicated divorce, the biggest question is not always “Who gets what?” It may be “What exactly is there?”

A spouse may know about the family home and checking account but have little understanding of business interests, investment accounts, retirement plans, deferred compensation, or other financial arrangements.

A complete financial review can therefore become an important early part of the process. The goal is not to assume that every asset will be divided equally or that every asset belongs in the marital estate. The goal is to identify what exists and then determine how New York law applies.

A Business Can Raise Questions That a Salary Does Not

A business interest can make a divorce more complicated because its value may not be obvious from a bank statement. A closely held company may have equipment, accounts receivable, debts, intellectual property, goodwill, or other components.

There may also be questions about how the business was established, how it changed during the marriage, and whether either spouse contributed to its growth.

At Weisman, our attorney materials identify business valuation and equitable distribution among the issues handled in complex matrimonial matters. For someone searching for a matrimonial attorney in Valley Stream, the practical point is that a business should not be treated like an ordinary checking account. Its structure and financial history can matter.

High Income Does Not Answer Every Property Question

A high household income can make a divorce financially significant, but income is only one part of the picture. Two spouses may have substantial earnings and very different financial arrangements. One may own a business. Another may have significant retirement assets. There may be investment accounts, real estate, inherited property, or compensation that needs closer review.

This is where a high-asset divorce can overlap with equitable distribution without being the same subject. Equitable distribution provides the legal framework for dividing marital property. A high-asset case may require more financial investigation before the parties can even have a meaningful conversation about how that framework applies.

Separate Property Still Deserves Careful Attention

High-value assets can also raise questions about separate property. An inheritance may have been received during the marriage. A business may have existed before the wedding. A property may have been owned before the marriage and later changed in value.

The answer is not always determined by the date an asset first appeared. The financial history can matter. That is why documents can become so important. Records showing ownership, contributions, transfers, business finances, and other transactions may help establish what happened over time.

A matrimonial attorney in Valley Stream may need to understand those details before advising a client about the broader financial picture.

Financial Information Should Be Treated as Evidence, Not Just Paperwork

Financial documents can feel overwhelming when there are years of records to review. But each document may answer a different question. Tax returns can show income and business information. Account statements can help establish balances and transactions. Retirement records can identify assets that may otherwise be overlooked.

Business records may provide another layer of information. The goal is not to collect paperwork simply for the sake of having a large file. It is to build an accurate picture of the finances involved. That can make later negotiations more grounded in actual information.

Privacy and Strategy Matter Too

A complicated financial divorce can involve information that a client does not want discussed casually. Business owners may be concerned about sensitive business records. Professionals may have compensation structures that require explanation. Families may have significant property interests that need careful handling.

Those concerns do not remove the need for financial disclosure. They do mean the process should be handled deliberately and with attention to what information is required and how it is being used. A high-asset divorce should be approached as a financial and legal matter, not simply as a larger version of an ordinary divorce.

Conclusion

A high-asset divorce involving a business or complicated finances may require more than calculating the value of the assets that are easiest to see. The parties may need to identify financial interests, understand their history, determine how New York law classifies them and address the broader property and support questions.

If you are considering a matrimonial attorney in Valley Stream, getting the financial picture organized early can make the legal discussion more productive. At Weisman Law Group, we approach complex matrimonial matters with attention to the financial details that can affect the issues being negotiated or litigated.

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Could Divorce Mediation Work When You and Your Spouse Disagree?

9/1/2026

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​Divorce mediation is sometimes misunderstood as an option only for couples who agree about everything. That is not necessarily the case. Mediation helps spouses discuss unresolved divorce issues with a neutral mediator. 

The more important question is whether both people are willing to participate. For couples considering a divorce lawyer in Freeport, that distinction can help them decide what kind of conversation they need next.

Mediation Does Not Require You to Start With a Complete Agreement

You do not have to walk into mediation with every issue already settled. A couple might agree that the marriage should end but still have questions about the house, finances, parenting time, or support. Those unresolved matters can become the focus of mediation.
The mediator helps organize the discussion and keeps the conversation moving toward decisions. The spouses remain responsible for making those decisions. That is an important distinction. Divorce mediation is not a process where the mediator decides who gets the house or how much support one person should receive.

Instead, the mediator assists the couple as they work through the issues that need to be resolved. At Weisman Law Group, our current mediation page describes the process as voluntary and explains that couples can work through issues including custody, equitable distribution, maintenance, child support, business valuation, assets, and liabilities.

The Real Question Is Whether Both People Can Participate

Mediation only works as a shared process. If one spouse refuses to participate, the basic foundation for divorce mediation is missing. The same is true if someone agrees to attend but refuses to engage in meaningful discussions. That does not mean spouses need to have a friendly relationship.

They may still be frustrated, disappointed, or angry. What matters is whether both people can participate in a process where decisions are discussed rather than handed over to a judge. For someone looking for a divorce lawyer in Freeport, this is often a more useful test than asking whether the divorce is “amicable.”

A couple can have disagreements and still work toward an agreement. On the other hand, two people who appear calm on the surface may still have issues that cannot be resolved through mediation.

What Can You Actually Discuss?

The scope of the conversation depends on the circumstances of the marriage. One couple may spend most of its time discussing a parenting schedule. Another may need to work through property and financial questions.

If there are children, the discussion may include where they will spend school nights, how holidays will work, how vacations will be handled, and how parents will communicate about important decisions. Financial discussions may involve assets, debts, support, retirement accounts, or a business.

The point is not to force every family into the same arrangement. The goal is to address the issues that matter to that particular family. That can make mediation very different from starting with a fixed outcome and asking someone else to impose it.

A Mediator Is Not a Substitute for Your Own Legal Advice

There is an important limit to understand before starting divorce mediation. A mediator can provide legal information about the process, but that does not mean the mediator is acting as each spouse's individual attorney. We specifically advise that a spouse who wants individual legal advice should consult an independent attorney.

That can be particularly important when the divorce involves significant property, a business, retirement assets, or support questions. You may want help understanding what a proposed agreement means for you before you sign it. For some couples, mediation and individual legal advice can work alongside each other. The exact arrangement depends on the circumstances.

What Happens If You Reach an Agreement?

When the spouses resolve the issues, their decisions can be put into a written agreement. That document matters because a conversation is not the same thing as a finalized legal arrangement. A clear written agreement can address the terms the spouses have decided on and provide a framework for what happens after the divorce.

The details need to be reviewed carefully. A sentence about a house, retirement account, or parenting schedule can have consequences that are not obvious at first glance. That is one reason couples should treat the agreement as a legal document rather than simply the final version of a conversation.

What If Mediation Does Not Work?

Trying mediation does not mean you have committed to reaching an agreement at all costs. If the spouses cannot resolve their differences, other legal options remain available.
New York Courts recognize mediation as one form of alternative dispute resolution, but they also note that it may not be appropriate in every situation. Circumstances involving domestic violence or abuse, for example, may require a different approach. The important point is that mediation is a process, not a promise of a particular result.

Conclusion

Divorce mediation can give spouses a structured way to work through disagreements without asking a judge to decide every issue. But it depends on voluntary participation and a willingness to discuss the matters that stand between the couple and an agreement.
​

If you are considering a divorce lawyer in Freeport, it can be useful to look at the actual issues in your marriage before deciding how to proceed. At Weisman Law Group, we can help you understand the legal options that may apply to your circumstances, including when mediation may be worth considering.

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​5 Reasons Why Divorce Mediation is a Better Alternative for Families

6/18/2020

457 Comments

 
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According to Statistica, the divorce rate in New York in 2018 was 2.8 divorces per thousand inhabitants in the State of New York.  Was that number lower or higher than you expected? Based on public records and other data, the divorce rate is at the third lowest rate it has been since 1990.  Fewer people in New York are getting divorced right now.

But for couples that have exhausted efforts to reconcile, a low divorce rate doesn’t really mean much does it? Because you are preparing to start or participate in a divorce, and what other people do does not matter.  Right now, its about you and your children, and your future.  And you are going to need some legal help.

What is Divorce Mediation?

There is no mystery behind the reason why some divorces can be so contentious. We are talking about deep emotional impact here.  It hurts to end a relationship.  It is scary when you think about the process of separation and what that is going to look like, from your pension to your debt, custody, and child support, down to who gets the dog and leather sofas.

At Weisman Law Group, we are trained divorce litigators, helping our clients navigate the difficult process of a convention divorce in court.  However, over the years of our legal practice in family law, many times we ran into couples that were not contentious at all.  In fact, they did not need to be in a court of law either.  They were capable of “settling out of court” through a process called divorce mediation.

Working with an Attorney mediator, the partners can proceed through the steps of divorce by negotiating terms that are favorable.  The mediator works as an advocate for both partners, helps determine conditions or assets that are not disputed (and easily divisible).  Then proceeds to aspects of the divorce agreement where the partners are not in agreeance, and where constructive negotiations begin.

A mediation that is successful ends in a non-contentious divorce for the couple. The divorce is filed, custodial and non-custodial terms are set, and the financials are determined and processed (including division of assets).  Without ever stepping foot in a court room.

Our team at Weisman Law Group would like to share the top five (5) reasons why couples are now choosing divorce mediation instead of litigation.

1. Mediation Can Reduce Legal Costs Compared to Litigation

Initiating a divorce is not the expensive part.  The process is fairly straight forward when both parties agree.  It is the litigation in a contentious divorce, where couples cannot compromise or meet common ground for important decisions, that litigation becomes costly.

Once the matter has gone to court, the divorcing partners will not only incur legal fees from their private divorce attorneys, but also court fees, document and evidence administration fees, courier fees for agreement reviews and more. 

With divorce mediation, all administrative processes are handled within our office at Weisman Law Group. We do recommend that couples try remediation first, before proceeding with a conventional divorce in family court. It can save you time, frustration, and expense.

If the divorcing couple is unable to reach an agreement with the assistance of a divorce mediator, the process will be moved up to Family Court.  And it is not how long your divorce might take in court that is concerning; it’s how long it can take for a Family Court case to be heard, when there are a backlog of cases  for the court to review.

2. It Can Reduce Emotional Damage and Create a Better Relationship Between Divorcing Partners

We know from clinical research and also through friends from divorced families, that dissolution of a marriage when there are children involved is tragic, if the divorce becomes a hostile battle, instead of a negotiation between two adults to want to start a new chapter in their lives.

No one intends to harm their children.  And most couples think they can navigate divorce without becoming hostile or allowing the child or children to see the upsetting instances of arguments and fights.

Divorce mediation is less adversarial. When both partners work together to find a fast and mutually acceptable agreement, then can move on and into the new chapter of the life faster and with less discord.  This is helpful when it comes to families who will be sharing custody as it creates a more amicable and cooperative split.

3. Divorce Mediation is a Much Faster Process

How fast is fast? That of course, depends on the couple.  But in many cases divorce mediation can be as fast as 3-4 sessions.  Some married partners have already formalized most of the negotiation on paper before they retain a divorce mediator, in which case, there will be little to work out before filing for legal divorce.

However, other couples who really cannot agree on certain items, will need a mediator to bring each issue or item to the table for consideration, discussion and decision making.  The more issues there are, the longer the mediation can take.  But overall, it is much faster. 

The average conventional divorce in the State of New York requires a period of at least six months of irreparable separation before the divorce can be filed.   A mediation divorce can be done in about 3-8 sessions on average. Without having to go to court at all. And in special circumstances, the mediation can be scheduled for evenings or weekends to avoid disruption during the business day for the clients.

4. It Creates Less Distress and Instances of Trauma for Children 

As a parent, we know that children hear everything.  Even the things you try so hard to shelter them from, if you are a couple engaged in a contentious separation and divorce, the hostility has a negative impact on your child or children.

Some couples think that living in a separate residence during the divorce is a good idea.  If the situation is volatile, it can help to reduce the amount of toxicity and stress in the home environment for children.  However, separate residences may not stop the aggression.  It has the same impact whether the child witnesses it or overhears daily aggressive conversations.

Taking a collaborative and compromising approach to divorce, bypasses the exposure to the kind of toxicity and psychological trauma that can have a lifelong impact on children.  In very cooperative instances, the child or children may even be involved as part of the mediation process. To feel confident that they are also part of the process for defining the new structure of the family.

5. Compromise in Mediation Means Everyone Wins

No partner should feel like they emerged at a disadvantage, after a divorce agreement is signed and filed. When you enter into divorce mediation with one of our Attorneys at Weisman Law Group, you have the benefit of more than our legal services.  You have guidance and advice from a divorce lawyer with experience in some of the more difficult psychological and relationship aspects of getting a divorce.

Many of the conflicts that appear between divorcing couples can be ironed out with the help an experienced divorce mediator.  Some couples arrive with a thought out and detailed draft divorce agreement and want a legal professional to review it.  Others attend divorce mediation because they do not know where they need to start, but they know they do not want to fight.
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And that is a good start for a peaceful, non-contentious divorce that could help both partners get on the road to healing and recovery. Divorce mediation is kinder to your spouse, kinder to yourself and to your savings account.

Schedule your free divorce consultation with us.  Weisman Law Group serves Nassau County, and surrounding areas of New York.


457 Comments

​You Have Asked for A Divorce and Your Spouse is Spending Excessively: What Should You Do?

6/18/2020

788 Comments

 
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When you have been married for a long time, you usually fall into shared spending habits.  Whether that means a monthly budget and savings schedule, or how much money you spend collectively on entertainment, vacations, and other essentials.

No one knows you like your spouse does.  And that is probably why contentious divorces can become so aggravated between partners. It is literally a war to dissolve a union, with some significant emotional ‘sucker punches’ thrown in to hurt each other in the process. 

Game playing that sometimes takes a nasty turn, jeopardizing the financial health of both partners. A game where really, nobody wins in the end.

Dissipation During Divorce: When Self-Indulgent Spending Crosses the Line

This is a common problem and difficulty we help our divorce clients face.  As the divorce begins to progress, one spouse may start spending irresponsibly and abnormally.  Like I mentioned, you already know the normal spending habits of your spouse.  But suddenly, they begin to spend a lot more money than usual, on things that they never spent money on before.

From a human nature perspective, facing a divorce also means getting ready to be single again. It’s a transitioning phase from marriage to living a single life again; with or without children.  Acknowledging that you are going to be single in the near future means you may want to update your wardrobe a little, take a class, or go to some counseling sessions to help you work through emotions of separation and divorce.  That type of spending should be anticipated; it is very normal during a divorce.

But what if those patterns of spending suddenly become very abnormal? What if it’s not a new suit or an expensive new bag, but several of them?  What if your spouse begins taking their friends on trips, or buys larger ticket items such as a new car, while leveraging shared credits and equity in the home?

Suddenly, your spouse has crossed a line.  A very large and expensive one that threatens your own financial security and that of your children.  Can your spouse be held accountable for dissipation spending during a divorce? How do New York family law courts, Supreme Court in New York, view dissipation spending , and where does the responsibility lie; with one or both spouses?

Scenario One: The Spouse Who Earns More Money Is Spending Recklessly

One case comes to mind where the couple knew they were going to file for divorce. It was something that the couple had discussed (and argued about) many times.  They were preparing to head to divorce mediation to amicably split, and then the spending started to happen.

Her husband had never used credit cards.  He loathed them, and if he had to use one, he paid off the balance right away.  He had a previous personal bankruptcy and was afraid of making the same mistake twice.  Suddenly, the husband was charging everything on shared credit cards.

Gas for his vehicle, new clothing, new furniture, an expensive club membership and eating out at some of the restaurants he previously thought were too expensive.  If half the debt was going to be his wife’s responsibility, and if he felt that he was responsible for the greater part of accumulating assets and equity, it’s a malicious act to whittle down asset value before it is equitably divided by the court.

Scenario Two:  The Spouse Who Earns Less Money Is Spending Irresponsibly

Spouses who have a large gap in education, career development and earning potential may face this problem.  No one likes to think about being tight for money after a divorce. It is definitely an adjustment from dual to single income life.  This thought (and perhaps some horror stories of destitute former spouses) is enough to send a divorcing spouse into spending overdrive.

You would think that the spouse who earns less money doesn’t spend or purchase things on a large scale and certainly not out of malice. Such spending can be an expression of anxiety.  They may start purchasing things they will need in their new residence, such as dishes, linens, furnishings and even food.  Sometimes they will even hide the purchased goods at a parent or friend’s house. 

Divorce can inspire a very deep fear trigger that nudges people to survival like behaviors that are not otherwise considered normal.  And things really go bad when the credit card statement arrives.  

Scenario Three: A Spouse is Increasing Debt While You Suspect They Are Hoarding Cash

The credit card statements are showing something new; cash advances from your shared accounts.  While trying your best to avoid each other, sometimes things can get expensive.  But withdrawing frequent sums of money via cash advance from a credit card is a significant warning flag that you need to pay attention to.

This tactic doesn’t involve spending money (not right now anyway).  It can be about hoarding cash outside of the house and underneath the radar of financial disclosure during divorce proceedings.  The result? Increased debt that you may have to split evenly, while your former spouse unpacks an extra stash of cash right after the divorce is settled and filed.

Scenario Four: A Spouse Is Hoping Increased Debt Will Dissuade Divorce Proceedings

This specific game plan during a divorce can be waged by either gender. The most common scenario involves the more monied spouse, the primary wage earner, that engages in overspending, with a strategy in mind.

If the marital assets are significant enough that the divorcing partner will have a sustainable income and equity, increasing debt would no doubt complicate life for the spouse exiting the marriage.  For instance, if the partners own a home with significant equity, the assailing spouse may expect that increasing the household debt will result in less monetary benefit from the sale of the home.

Afterall, debt shared by spouses must be discharged during a divorce (or split equitably). If that equity disappears because of increased debt, will the spouse stay?  Will they change their mind about divorce? It’s unlikely, but they may seek legal guidance about dissipation of assets in the State of New York. 

What Does New York State Law Say About Dissipation of Pre-Divorce Assets?

New York State Courts view dissipation of marital assets as a deliberate act of malice, designed to fraudulently reduce the monetary value of assets, and the amount of compensation that the other spouse will receive.  But there is no formal measure or definition of criteria for “wasteful spending” in dissipation cases; it is up to the Judge to decide.

Some very obvious and clear examples of dissipation can include:
  • Shopping excessively or purchasing higher than normal expensive items
  • Gambling (in excess of normal habits or behaviors)
  • Selling any property for a lower than market value in an effort to liquidate the asset with the lowest possible monetary return
  • Spending on an extramarital affair

When spending is intentionally disruptive or damaging to the other spouse, the Court may hold the accused spouse financially responsible for dissipation.  What that means is that the Court may allow a list or petition of a cumulative financial award in favor of the victim spouse, accounting for cash withdraws, asset sale and other compensation.

Dissipation is not the answer.  Even when you are feeling anger toward your spouse, it is a fraudulent act that can land the offending spouse deeper into financial problems, after an adjustment by the court.

If you suspect your spouse is engaging in dissipation of assets or monetary funds while you are preparing for legal divorce, contact our team at Weisman Law Firm for a free 30-minute legal consultation. 

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